Saturday, May 10, 2008@3:35 PM
again, titleless.
sigh.
somehow i need to spill this all out but yet it's so ridiculously ridiculous, no one will believe it even if i say so.
what do i tell my friend who is breaking every other moment? what should i be saying to encourage her when i myself feel otherwise? i'm all for leaving it behind but obviously i'm not in the same shoes as her so what can i tell her? be like us and drop everything, which she can't?
it's not that i don't feel the tension. of course i do but a bigger part of it is for myself. i've been a graduate since february and 3 months later i'm still jobless. what does that say? i don't have the motivation to even start typing up my empty resume so how can i tell other people to move on when i can't? i feel so helpless and useless, just sitting at home everyday spending my parents' money without earning some of my own.
i hate this situation and worse off i hate the person who put us in this situation. so ridiculous. i can't believe this is happening. just when we move past an issue, another bigger and worse issue drops right in front of us. everyone is telling us different stories, and heck, we're telling each other different stories. what are we supposed to believe in? who are we supposed to believe in?
i wished i was still studying or i had found a job immediately after graduating. then i would have a mindless routine to stick to instead of sitting in my room the whole time.
sigh.